Small Town America - (December 21, 2016)


 
What comes to mind when you hear the phrase “Small Town America?”  Do you envision a close-knit community that endeavors to build each other up?  Do you long for the slower pace and welcoming sense of belonging that the phrase conjures up?  Do you imagine a sense of belonging that comes from knowing everyone’s name and never doubting that your family extends outside your immediate relatives to the whole community?

If only….Oh, the wonders of our imaginations and what we are able to create in our own minds. 

To be honest, many days I find myself yearning for a slower pace – a life away from the hustle and bustle of big city dwelling.  However, if you were to glimpse me today, as I sit in my high-rise office building in the metropolis of Denver, Co, I am quite certain you would feel the wrath that is consuming me as I contemplate the mire that a dear friend finds herself in the midst of her “Small Town America” community.  I don’t doubt that you might even see steam rolling from my ears if you look close enough. 

Before I go much further, I should probably warn you that I don’t intend to quell my Irish temper, nor my ingrained sense of responsibility to defend those who are being relentlessly attacked.  That means that if you are of gentle demeanor, this reading is not for you.  I most certainly will be using words and phrases that may offend your ears and may include, but are not limited to any of the following in any tense:  1) old bitty (n. Crazy elderly woman who is out of touch with the world yet thinks she knows something relevant and feels compelled to share it despite her ignorance); 2) hypocritical assholes; 3) bitches; 4) unchristian post-menopausal bats,  5) fishwife (a woman who speaks rudely); and any other expletive or generalization that I may find fitting or may strike my fancy as I go on. 

I would also like to state that I am not making a generalization of “Small Town America” but picking on one “Center of the United States” Kansas town and the un-ethical, hypocritical, uncalled for, childish, exasperating, ridiculous, ignorant, selfish, uneducated, bitchy and most certainly, unchristian actions of some women who claim to be leaders in that community.  So, unless this is your small town, please don’t get your knickers in a bunch.  If however, the topic of this extensive rant is in fact your small town and you might be part of this group of gremlins, well then; I encourage you to take offence, because I am aiming to insult, belittle and shame your pathetic, non-consequential existences. 

I will use “respect for your elders” as a jumping off point.  I was raised to respect my elders.  However, I was also taught that respect was earned.  Position, station in life, gender, religion, heritage, education, status, all these things lend little weight to the respect that one receives.   Respect should be given based on each person’s intrinsic value as a human being.  Take that to mean that I respect people based on their actual value that is based on underlying, intangible, unspoken aspects and traits that define a person’s character and philosophic basis.  It basically means I don’t give a flying fig who you tell me you are, how much money you do or don’t have, the position or title you’ve obtained, or how much you think of yourself.  I will judge whether to treat you with respect based on your inner compass that orchestrates your ethical code of conduct, your pool of empathy and compassion, as well as the actions that dominate your existence – your true soul, if you will. 

That being said, I can quickly list a handful of actions that will immediately bump you to the “questionable human being” list and if you are unable to read between the lines, please understand that I am bringing to light specifics character traits that directly relate to real life actions of the aforementioned bitches residing right at the geographical heart of our country in Kansas.  
 
1.      Avoiding Confrontation – Just because you don’t want to deal with an issue doesn’t mean you can idly sit by and allow for or tolerate bad behavior.  I learned when I was two that standing by watching bad behavior made me just as guilty as the offender if I didn’t take a stand against it.  

2.      Refusing Direct Communication – GROW UP!  Adults talk things through.  Passing notes didn’t work in high-school and it doesn’t work in adult-hood. 

3.     Placing Blame – Take Responsibility.  We are all human.  We all fuck up.  It’s ok.  What isn’t ok is refusing to acknowledge your role in things and leaving the blame to someone else to bear. 

4.      Excuses – If I hear one more person say, “I’m so busy” or “I have so much going on” I am going to punch them in the throat.  Yeah, no shit Sherlock! We are ALL busy.  Life keeps us busy and if you think you are busier than anyone else, you are an ignorant fool. 

5.      Making Assumptions – The old saying holds true.  To ASSUME is to make and ASS-out of-U-and-ME. 

6.      Lack of Empathy – Do you think you know what others face on a daily basis?  Do you think that you know what someone is coping with or living through?  Do you think that you have the right to judge them based on what you see, hear or purport to be their truth?  Well, if you do, then you are an ignorant, worthless excuse for a human being.   

7.      Judging – Really? Who are you to judge anyone, you arrogant, self-righteous, insecure, mean-spirited, hypocritical old bats?!?

8.      Self-Absorption / Self-Importance – I am so over this trend in our society.  There is a reason that people say we are stronger together.  Arrogance and self-absorption are a window into someone’s wicked and twisted soul.  NO! It isn’t all about you and YES! You should consider how your actions affect others – their feelings, their thoughts, their ideas, their efforts are not simply dismissible. 

9.      Gossip – Should anyone ever have to address gossip?  Weak, damaged, fearful, sad, lonely people participate in gossip. The End.

10.  Do Unto Others – One would think that this concept would be one of priority to anyone that calls themselves a Christian.  However, since it seems muddled to you, I suggest you reassess your understanding of “Do Unto Others” and in the meantime, hope that you are somehow spared, by the grace of God, the same kind of treatment that you dole out. 

 I could, with little effort, continue this list of bad behavior for a very long time.  I could site actual incidents and most likely the names of the offenders to match.  I will however, restrain myself from shaming you by name. 
 
  • Not because I wouldn’t like to walk in to your home or office and “rearrange all your crap” without telling you;
  • Not because I wouldn’t like to walk into your church and thumb my nose at you as I shirk your efforts and throw away a donation you’ve made;
  • Not because I wouldn’t relish the opportunity to brashly dismiss your concerns and belittle you as you have done to others;
  • Not because I wouldn’t find great joy in exposing the unethical handling of monies and “cooking of the books” that seems to be common place in your community;
  • Not because I wouldn’t take great joy in waiting for the opportune time to suck the joy out of you and make you feel like shit just because I can;
  • Not because I wouldn’t skip for joy as I berated you for your thoughts and ideas or belittled you by calling you names and not offering you support in your time of need;
  • Not because I wouldn’t be tempted to force you to work in a freezing room in the winter or a sweltering room in the summer;
  • Not because I wouldn’t smile a wicked smile of vengeance while I asked you to work without knowing if you will be paid;
  • Not because I wouldn't like you to feel the frustration of carrying the load all by yourself and yet become discouraged as you realize all your efforts will never be recognized, let alone appreciated;
  • Not because I wouldn’t clap gleefully if you were forced to put up with the fowl body odor of those who don’t concern themselves with hygiene and/or choose to defecate in the toilet that you are tasked with scrubbing with your own hands;
  • Not because I wouldn’t find a little joy in interrupting your life on your time to demand ridiculous tasks outside the realm of your duties;
  • Not even because I wouldn't sadistically love to play your nasty little game - sooooo much better than you do and show you exactly what it feels like.
 
No…I can without doubt say I would like to see each of you face these things and it would be very gratifying.  I personally would love to tie your names to the behavior that makes you the sad evil crones that you are. 

But never fear - you are saved from my vengeance, because I am safe in the anonymity of a big city and not stuck in the hell of your “Small Town America!” 

Shame on you for being awful people.  Shame on you for being bullies.  Shame on your for being old enough to be leaders, but acting like juveniles.  Shame on you for tainting the reputation of “Small Town America!”
 

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