SOUL MUD: Random Ramblings of my 24/7 Brain

I want to understand things.  In reality, my desire to understand is very selfish and self-serving.   Understanding enables me to find a path to acceptance - a place that I can self-soothe and restore balance to a tilted world.  Unfortunately, it seems that the things I most desperately need to understand are the very things that escape me.  How annoying is that?!? It doesn't however mean that I don't toil away, continuing to look for reasons so I can understand that which evades me.  Thoughts sit in the recesses of my mind - seeds - waiting to be planted and sown, preserved and stored or defined as weeds and thrown out.  I have found that my thoughts of late linger on those lost to this world by means of suicide.  This means of escape from our world seems to be more prevalent than ever.  Suicide is a great sadness.  I feel the sadness as more than just the very evident sharp pang felt at the loss of a precious life.  It is a tragic testament to the sad state of our sic

Music, painting, sculpture – these forms of art can reach a person and have an intense emotional effect, yet they leave room for the person listening, viewing or touching to interpret and project their own needs onto the art.      When I paint or create, a piece of me is no doubt infused into the end result.   Creating is a need that I feel, an  endeavor to express something with color and form.  It is something very real and formidable within me and needs to come out.  After I am done creating, I feel the drain and empty space that is left in me, just as I feel the connection to the creation that is a result of my efforts.    I struggle knowing that once a piece of art has been created, it is open to interpretation in the public eye.   I often explain to people that I have anxiety in presenting my art because I feel a vulnerability in how others interpret my art.  It is like they are judging me.  The expression I’ve laid bare has a meaning and a feeling and I want that to clearly

I got to thinking about the Skylark bird today.  The Skylark isn't a bright and showy bird.  As a matter of fact, it is pretty plain.  However, it is known for its prolonged song during its hovering flight. When I think about that, it seems pretty amazing to me.  It's a refreshing idea.  How awesome is it that a creature would sing its song, not to stand out to or for others, but for the sole purpose of bringing joy to its own flight.  If only we would stop and take note of the wisdom found in nature.  We have much to learn.   In honor of the Skylark, I wrote a poem about taking the time to do a little skylarking in our own lives. SKYLARKING - By Autumn Boyet-Stinton Twiddle-de-dee and twiddle-de-dum                Skylarking through life – to and from A joke, a trick, even a little bit of fun                Joyfully spinning round-and-round the sun A moment of silly, of pure delight                Enjoying life’s colors so true and bright