Stairs: They Used To Be Cool

 Random thought...As an adult, have you stopped to think about they way we thought about stairs and how they were kinda an event in our lives.  Really.  Think about stairs the way you used to think about stairs in your child-like mind...  


(Elevators and escalators will outrank stairs and will always be prioritized...and that's a whole other level of "event!"


Option 1: Sitting down, sticking legs straight out and going down bum first.  Solid option for any stair type in all environments.  Always.


Option 2:  Going down on your belly, arms straight out in front of your like Superwoman  feet first.  And if you are feeling really brave because 2 of your front teeth are loose and soon to fall out anyway, you can go down face first - keeping your chin up because the last time you were laughing too hard and ended up forgetting to lift your chin and you had a huge raspberry rug burn on your chin and not only did it sting, but you got really tired of unknowingly being the butt of some joke the adults all laughed at about rug burns 🤷‍♀️.  So still a good option, but carpet burn is a reality you must be willing to risk.  Probably just an indoor carpeted stair is required for this option. 


Option 3: Using the sweatshirt tied around your waist or other clothing item (or even a piece of cardboard or the book you left on the stairs, the damp towel you left laying in the hallway, if your that lucky - just don't even think about using clean laundry your mom told you to put away - that won't end well) as a sled of sorts to slide down the stairs.  This option could be an all environment option determined on a case by case basis.  Additionally, this option can be adjusted to accommodate "doubles" or the "in a jumble" option if you have a blanket or better yet, a sleeping bag. Note: It is always recommended you hold the blanket for others to get on first so you don't end up on the bottom on the heap at the bottom.  


Option 4:  Attempting to take the stairs 2 or 3 at a time, or jumping a whole section to the mid-landing.  This option is you just making the best out of a situation that won't allow for options 1-3. 


Option 5:  The way we do it now. No point in talking about it, cuz there is nothing fun about the way we go down, nor up the stairs now-a-says.  As a matter of fact, any joy we might have once felt traversing stairs, is replaced with concern for an new ache that has just recently started worrying us and sometimes real fear that we might actually kill ourselves with a foolish misstep, and a little disgust that the 2 glasses of wine that we just drank is making us seriously consider just sleeping on the couch, (and it is actually a comfy couch because I'm finally at a place in my life that I'm willing to pay more for a quality made, classic furniture piece that will last a lifetime) instead of risking it.  


Yeah...stairs used to be so much more fun.




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