I'm Not Gonna Lie - I Like Sleep! & A Poem: The Twilight (5/7/2019)

I like to sleep. 

I like the feeling of drifting off to sleep in a cool, comfy bed with freshly bleached soft sheets in a cool dark room. 

I like naps - short naps, long naps - all the kinds of naps.  I love feeling as thought I am stealing a little something out of the middle of the day.  I like to sleep on the couch, the guest bed, the patio, the porch, in the mountains, on the beach...I like to sleep. 

I especially like the weird stage of falling asleep (that I refer to as twilight) where things, thoughts and sounds are distorted and oddly psychedelic and a little bizarre and yet I'm still conscious enough to know I'm in a bit of an alternate reality and I can think, "Whoa!  This is kinda cool." 

I find that in that space before sleep settles in and takes over, (twilight) I am often the grateful recipient of inspiration and that is super cool.  For this very reason, I keep a pen and paper in my nightstand because as much as I think I'll remember an idea in my waking hours, it is usually impossible to recall and that is a really big bummer. 

This happened to me last night - apparently - for I arrived in to work this morning and found that I had sent myself an email in the middle of the night (as indicated by the time stamp on the email) with a few lines hashed out.  Why my work email?  I couldn't tell you, but it turned out to be a fairly interesting collection of poetic lines that where 100% a result of my experience in my own sleepy "twilight zone!" 

*********


THE TWILIGHT
By Autumn Boyet-Stinton

Tethered to the waking world, but hearing the beckoning call of sleep
Over my shoulder, a glance toward reality but out of my consciousness I do seep. 

As if viewing from above, I linger to contemplate sensations of the surreal
I can no longer determine reality in the things I perceive, hear, see and feel. 

Not here nor there, but where?  I know I’m most certainly not gone. 
Held to my body as if by memory – nothing more, not to return before the dawn. 

And so my tether comes undone at once and I’m released from a steady grasp
Out of my life, free of pain, responsibility and for a moment I am aghast. 

For here feel a body betrayal, ardent and leaving not a doubt
I’ve gained access to something bigger than me, and control I am without.

The sensation is so striking that I feel as though I might be lost
For from the conscious living over twilight’s threshold I have crossed. 

I swallow panic and perk my thoughts to absorb what I can now feel
And questions tumble in my mind, what is this? and could this possibly be real?

My instinct tells me to ease on in and fear not, but just let go
For in this twilight, wonder, release and weightless freedom I can know.

And freedom comes on whisper air that drapes and lifts me up
Then beckons to me to taste deliverance from my binding by sipping of her cup.

Sensation washes through me and continues right on through
It’s now clear to me that twilight is just the beginning and I know what I should do.

Unweighted by reality, letting go, I float, I fly, I soar
Moving without thought is seems towards twilight’s exit door.

I’ve found comfort here and learned acceptance in this space
But, I must leave the twilight for I now know, the glory of sleep that I must chase. 

Goodbye sweet twilight, your wiles tempted and taught me much
I found delight, enjoyment and great release while being in your clutch.

So I’ll be back again quite soon, to peek inside your door
Knowing you will patiently teach me again to feel and let go so that I may find yet more. 

The keeper of the outer doors of sleep you will remain
And ruler of the sleeping and dreaming realms, for me you will always reign. 

DREAMSCAPE - by Autumn Boyet Stinton © 2013

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