SOUL MUD: Random Ramblings of my 24/7 Brain

Here we are…on the cusp of a New Year.  ( ß Notice no exclamation point.)  2022 is on the doorstep, ready to dawn a new year…and I have feelings.  Big feelings.  Mucky feelings.  “Soul Mud” if you will.  2020 was “the year the didn’t happen.”  As for 2021, I am starting to think that it was “the year that we wish didn’t happen.”  If you know me, you know that I feel that New Years resolutions are ridiculous.  They don’t work for me.  They are just a list of things that I either know I should do better at, or have been conditioned to believe will make me happier.  So I tend to just “reflect” over the past year as a new year gets ready to dawn.  I try to recall the ups and downs, find reasons to be grateful and things to look forward to in the upcoming months.  There were a lot of events, trips, special memories and opportunities for us to be with our friends and family this past year.  I am very grateful for all those moments and memories.  I treasure each big and small moment, a

 

So, here's the thing...I've always prescribed to the thought that "hope" could be unhealthy and in fact made me weak in that I was wallowing in "hope" instead of facing reality head on. BUT....I had an epiphany of sorts that goes a little something like this: Hope is the beginning of faith... Faith is the basis of belief... Belief is knowing... Knowing is assurance... And assurance in ourselves becomes our reality! And that, my friends, was a BIG thought...                                                                          ColoradoClicks Photography by Autumn Boyet-Stinton 

Have you ever stopped to think about your name in relation to your being?   AUTUMN - That's my name, given to me so that I can become known to others - so that I am free to be a unique individual in and of myself.  It is the name that I answer to, and thus, I am more myself than any other.   My name was given to me.  While some may have associations with my given name, I have the option, if not even the responsibility, to make myself known by and AS my name.  I can dictate how my name is known in association with - and because of me and how I become the name.  I am able to manifest what the name is in conjunction with the me that is nameless and simply is.   But what of me?  Who was I?  Who am I?  Who will I be?  How will I be remembered?  Am I empathetic, kind, positive, happy, joyful, noisy, fiery, complicated, genuine, faithful, willing?   These things I need to ask myself  - mindfully.  And then, I need to be open to the answer sent so as to actually receive the message.   I ca

ONE by Autumn Boyet-Stinton (7/2/2021)  One breath, one beat     Continuing as one... Bound together with love     Control undone.  Electric and static     A charge in the air... Companionship, respect, support     We do share. ArtByAutumn - Autumn Boyet-Stinton 

  An Ode: To Nature  - by Autumn Boyet-Stinton Ode to the mountains, Ode to the stars, Outside in the fresh air,  Released from life's bars.    Ode to the rivers, Ode to the trees, Released of constraints, And worries like these. Ode to the freedom, Ode to the space, The cleansing of my soul, Nature, my saving grace. 

     The other night, we were stopped at a stoplight, leaving downtown.  A car pulled up in the other turning lane next to us, stopped briefly and then then turned across traffic against the traffic light as though the light meant nothing to them.        That incident got me to thinking...do you ever stop and think about how close we are to total anarchy?  Seriously.  Thinking back to that simple traffic stoplight - Why did they think they were above the law?  What's to prevent someone else pulling up and thinking, "If they don['t have to stop, neither do I!"  When you stop to think about it for a second, our semi-controlled and peaceful existence is precariously balanced on the ideals that we should all follow guidelines that protect the peace and make us a society of law abiding citizens that look out for the good of all, not just the good of ourselves.        The reality is that the numbers are actually pretty intimidating and frightening when you stop to consider

  Listen to the Music – by Autumn Boyet-Stinton (September 14, 2021)   At times the world feels heavy, pushing down upon my back, I feel a crushing sadness, and an impending raged crack… But I listen to the music, and it calms my racing mind.   To keep from going crazy, to keep the rage more calm, To keep my nerves from shattering, draining my peace all gone… I listen to the music, and I feel myself connect.   In moments I feel sadness, or emotion without control, When life has done its best (or worst), to take a vicious toll… I listen to the music, and I center from within.   No matter what the feeling, or where I might be led, I can escape the pressure and voices in my head… When I listen to the music, and wrap up in her arms.   No moment is without a tune, life’s notes are always there, It means no one is left alone, with all the weight to bear. So, I listen to the music and let it soothe my soul.     I Listen to the music…and find peace a